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Why This, Why That, and Why

If you haven’t heard this song before, a collaboration between Jean Michel Jarre and the Swiss band Yello, then I recommend it highly.  I was struck by a verse that goes like this:   When I was thrown into this planet I didn’t know what was going on I was messing with my pacifier All day long. https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=ifFfxrnUuFs   I think the song is all about the same topic as the usual type of pop song lyric and is something along the lines of ‘why are we here and what is life all about?’ But this line has a special mea.. Read More


How Sex and Porn Addiction Affects relationships

A high number of clients seek help for their compulsive porn use and sex-related addictive behaviours because their relationship with their partner is put at risk.  Until their partners say that they are unhappy and are ready to leave many addicts do not even recognise their behaviours as unhealthy or potentially damaging.  They stay in denial until something bad happens or is imminent.  Many men in particular bring their addictive behaviours into a committed relationship and continue with them in secret – such as looking at porn or sexting – and somehow.. Read More


Free Resources For Sex and Porn Addiction - getting started.

This is module 1 of my free online toolkit for recovery from sex and porn addiction.   Module 1 will get you started on the road to recovery from porn and sex ‘addiction’ and compulsive behaviours with 6 really easy techniques for building and fortifying your commitment to change.    Before we go any further, let’s touch on the nature of commitment and why it is so vital to recovery from sex and porn addiction.  Commitment to change is the most critical element of being successful in achieving full recovery from addictive behavio.. Read More


VICIOUS TO VIRTUOUS (V2V) FREE ONLINE RECOVERY PROGRAMME FROM SEX AND PORN ADDICTION - Module 6 Common Triggers for Sex Addiction and Porn Addiction - Part B - Emotions and their role in the addiction spiral

Emotions and their role in the addiction spiral You may remember from module 2 and 3 that in the V2V model of sex and porn addiction that the addiction spiral is powered by triggers including emotions.  So its worth exploring the role of emotions and in particular trying to understand your own version of experiencing them as a core strategy in managing sex and porn addiction and attaining sustained recovery. What do we know about emotions? Well we know that they are probably unique to humans and are often categorised into 8 groups each of which is a constellation of similar emotions.. Read More


Sex addiction - basic guide.

Sex and porn addiction can include excessively indulging in one or a combination of some of the following most often in secret: Porn – on/off-line images and film On-line chatting, sexting and dating via 'hook-up' apps Use of regular dating sites when already in a good relationship On-line use of sex workers such as web cams or sex chat lines Sexual encounters with strangers – physical and by phone/texting Multiple secret relationships/partners when in a commited relationsip Affairs – brief and over-time Masturbation used compulsively/excessively .. Read More


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