Why sex and porn addicts find it hard to get help for their addiction.

Why sex and porn addicts find it hard to get help for their addiction.

Taboos, shame, embarassment and low motivation are, in Esteem Therapy's experience of working with clients, probably the key reasons addicts find it extremely challenging to seek and get help.  It is not until the negative consequences of the behaviours take addicts into crisis that these barriers are usually overcome.  In addition, addicts think that they are going to be judged, or outed publicly somehow, or simply lack confidence enough to talk about difficult things and do 'emotional' talk.

There is still a huge taboo, or stigma attached to sex and porn addiction.  Let's face it, talking about sex in a serious way is not something we are generally comfortable with anyway.  The vast majority of Esteem Therapy's clients, like most of us, received their sex education and awareness not from parents or teachers but from the playground and later, the internet.  So discussing an addiction related to sex, a subject which in its most innocent form sparks embarassnent , is made many times more painful for most - clients comment that taking about drinking, drugs and gambing habits is far easier.  Addicts considering getting help should remember that treatment specialists such as Esteem Therapy understand the sensitivities surrounding the subject and how these can be a barrier and always allow clients to talk at their own pace and in their own words.

Shame and embarassment are very strong blocks to addicts getting help because they feel often feel unworthy of any support and fear further judgement and censure.  Sex addiction treatment counsellors are trained well so that they do not allow judgement to cloud their empathy for clients and limit the progress they might make.  We know that sex and porn addictions are sets of behaviours that are out of control - they are not a typically a reflection of an addicts moral compass or genetic make-up.  Even where the behaviours have crossed the line into illegal activities addicts can expect to receive the same level of non-judgemental support from an Esteem Therapy specialist.

Low motivation is probably one of the strongest barriers to getting help before crisis occurs.  Like most of us in general living addicts won't make changes until it starts to matter.  Esteem Therapy believes the best way to overcome this, and you may be an addict only just doing your first research into the subject, is to take advantage of the free brief consultation usually available by phone and lasting no more than 15 minutes to help you consider your options and not to keep putting it off.  The next step is to take up an initial face to face assessment to jointly gauge the scale of the addiction and how it can be controlled.  At least then an informed choice can be made about next steps.  Most counsellors, and certainly at Esteem, are flexible with the frequency and number of sessions and may also adjust the fees if finances are tight.