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Couple Therapy for Sex and Porn Addiction

Some of you with out-of-control sex and porn-related behaviours may be in a relationship and want to involve your partner in your recovery. This page explains this option and how Esteem works with clients who choose it.

I work mostly with the individual experiencing addiction or compulsive behaviour difficulties.  However, as the partner is such an important part of the addicts life, it is critical that partners are involved in the treatment and recovery process in some way.  The following list outlines the options open to couples and partners:

  1. Recommended option - couple treatment and support programme where I work with the couple initially then the partner of the addictive partner receives support from an external trusted and trained counsellor - see below for more details.  This is a structured package designed to help each individual get the support they need for themselves, give the relationship a good opportunity to re-build but also allow partners to consider/discuss their own options confidentially.
  2. I can also meet with partners in an 'information, advice and guidance' session to answer questions about sex addiction and porn addiction and discuss in general terms what the work with their partner entails and what they can do to look after themselves. 
  3. I am able to work with partners of those with addictive behaviours where I am not already involved.

I am not able to provide both partners with individual ongoing sessions for an extended period as there is a risk of confidentiality being broken and of the sessions becoming a form of mediation.  However, the combination of a small number of individual sessions, followed by couple sessions is a useful option.

Couple Treatment and Support Programme for Addicts and their Partners. (see 1) above)

This package has been created to provide structured support for a couple.  It does not assume the partner of the addicted partner has decided to stay in the relationship and allows both to discuss their options confidentially.

The injured partner will be seriously affected by the disclosure or discovery of the behaviours and will experience a form of trauma arising from intense feelings of betrayal leading to loss of sleep, numbness, shock, anger, loss of concentration and at worst, thoughts of suicide (70% of partners in research experienced severe impairment to social, work and general functioning aspects of their lives).  Both of you will be affected so both need professional help. If both commit to doing some serious work then the treatment path will be shorter and more cost-effective.  If only one partner completes treatment there is always an ongoing risk to the strength of the relationship and also a higher risk of relapse.

What the couple treatment and support programme involves.

An initial consultation and assessment session involving couple discussions and confidential individual discussions over 1.5 hours.

12 individual sessions with the addictive partner will explore the possible roots of the behaviours and start to put in place strategies to control triggers and avoid relapse.  The work will focus heavily on levels of motivation and finding an individualised approach to making change happen. Further disclosure of any other secrets will be discussed and planned.

Partner individual work will include a one hour education/information and self-care session with therapeutic support for the traumatic impact of disclosure/discovery.  In addition, the partner will receive therapy from an external trained counsellor to explore their own emotional responses and access personal support.

 

 

 

 

Don't be afraid to call us on 07539 952864 to simply find out if our couple counselling in Yorkshire can meet your needs before committing.

Interested?

Contact us using the form below or call us on 07711 887391.

Please Note: Do not send your partner's or someone else's details without their knowledge. This is a breach of trust and also unlawful use of their personal data. Please call if you are worried about someone or need help yourself and I can advise you of the best course of action.

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